| TARDIS | It's a great day for America everybody | What did we learn on the show tonight, Craig? | Craiky-Dingo | Do tell. |
| Whose that at the door? | Sex party! | What do you think, Geoffrey Peterson? | Oprah | What's-a-come-ana-go. |
| Ooh-la-la | For reals? | CRAIG FERGUSON BINGO (free square) | Me-ow! | Lesbian row |
| I love Maryland. I got crabs there once. | In your pants | Balls | Kangaroo testicles | Best damn nite of my life. |
| Never saw that coming! | Grow a pair of testicles | What time is it Geoffrey Peterson? | Awkward pause or mouth organ? | One is a ____ and the other is a ____. |